Wednesday, 24 September 2014

EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT WHEN AND HOW TO TRUST

IT'S NOT AS BLACK AND WHITE AS THINKING SOMEONE IS EITHER TRUSTWORTHY OR NOT.


The issue of trust--and our lack of it--is huge in our culture today. We hear comments about trust all over the news and frequently in personal conversations: “I don’t trust him.” “They aren’t trustworthy.” “Big organizations can’t be trusted.”
The reasons why there seems to be an epidemic of lack of trust are a complicated discussion in and of itself. But let’s first understand what “trust” really is, so we can think, talk, and respond accurately to relevant situations.

IT’S NOT AS SIMPLE AS TRUST VS. DON’T TRUST

Trust is not a global entity--although we talk like it is--“I just don’t trust her.” In actuality, trust is situation-specific. We trust someone to be able to do some task. For example, if you were to trust me to fix your car, your trust would be misplaced because I have virtually no mechanical abilities at all. However, if you believed that I could type your paper for you relatively quickly, assuming I had the time, that would be a good situation in which to trust me.
The reason that it is important to understand that trust is situation-specific is because we then have a pathway to take in order to build or rebuild low levels of trust. If we just say, “They aren’t trustworthy," there is nothing the other party can do to remedy the situation. It is a personal judgment you have made and that is that.
Also, a vague “I don’t trust them” absolves the person making the statement of any personal responsibility. They have an opinion and there is nothing required of the speaker. It is like saying, “He’s a jerk.” A judgment is made and there is nothing I need to do. This typically isn’t helpful in building relationships. When we believe the other person is the source of the problem and that the issue only will be resolved when they change, not much good can happen.

CREATING SITUATIONS OF TRUST

When we understand that trust is situation-specific, then a relationship can move beyond the “all or nothing” impasse (she’s trustworthy/not trustworthy). I can now say, “I trust John to be able to drive me to the airport and get me there on time” even though I may not trust him to manage my personal finances. So, when we are having difficulty in trusting someone for a certain task, it can be helpful to identify situations or tasks for which you can trust them and proceed in that area. This is especially helpful when dealing with new colleagues or those who are still learning their job--give them a task that you believe they can do.

THE THREE C’S OF TRUST

Besides being situation-specific, it is helpful to grasp the three foundational components of trust: competence, consistency, and character.
They are like the legs on a three-legged stool; without all three being present, the chair falls over.
1. Competence
If a person or business doesn’t have the ability to do the task you desire, it is foolish to trust them to do so. Having the knowledge, ability, resources, and capacity to complete a task is at the foundation of trust. This is why testimonials, references, or endorsements from prior customers are so important--they provide external evidence to the claims of the service provider or manufacturer.
2. Consistency
A person or an organization may have the competence to complete the task; they have the skills, talent, and expertise to do what is expected. But if their products are of inconsistent quality, if they cannot consistently get the product to you in time, or if they as a service provider don’t show up, it doesn’t do you much good. In many service sectors, there are plenty of competent technicians, but if you don’t know if or when they will come to do the work, you are not able to depend on them.
3. Character
In this context, character primarily refers to honesty, integrity, and the belief that the other person is considering your needs as well as their own. Lack of trust in business dealings (especially complex ones) often relies on the parties’s willingness to trust that the information being given is true, there is nothing important being hidden or left out, and that the other party is not just wanting to make a quick buck, but that they actually will deliver the goods or services they are promising.
Generally speaking, it is acceptable for an individual or a company to look out for their own interests (they have to make money to stay in business). However, you want to know they are not only looking out for themselves, but are considering your needs and desires, as well.

STEPS TO TAKE WHEN TRUST IS IN DOUBT

If you are having difficulty trusting someone else:
  1. 1. Try to specify, as much as you can, what action you are having trouble trusting them with and why. Ask yourself what they have done or not done to cause this?
  2. 2. Consider which of the Three C’s is related to your lack of trust in this situation.
  3. 3. Identify situations or actions for which you are willing to trust them. When possible, let them affirm their trustworthiness in these situations.
  4. 4. Determine what they could do that would shore up your trust of them in this situation and consider certain conditions and parameters under which you would be willing to trust them to do this.



Ifsomeone is having difficulty trusting you:
  1. 1. Ask them directly if there is something that you have done that has undermined their trust of you. If so, take appropriate actions like apologizing and making reparations to address this event.
  2. 2. Affirm your desire to be trusted by them and assert your willingness to do what is required to earn or rebuild their trust.
  3. 3. Be willing to take initial actions to demonstrate your trustworthiness, either in other situations or under specific defined parameters.
  4. 4. Be sure to follow through and make evident your competence, consistency, and that you are considering their interests as well as your own.

Trust in relationships is the foundation to living life cooperatively in a community. Use these tips to aid you in building deeper and broader trust with those around you.
From Fast Comapny

3 Mistakes to Avoid When You Have to Fire an Employee


Letting an employee go is an unfortunate part of being a leader, but one that you need to know how to do properly.
It's one of the worst parts about being a leader. Asking someone to leave your company is a part of leadership that many business owners don't understand how to execute. It is also something most of us try to avoid doing as much as possible. But there is a right way to go through with it and, as head of an organization, it's your job to know when it's time to do so.
But before you let another team member go, learn from missteps others have made. Here are three of the worst mistakes you can make when firing an employee.
1. Waiting too long to pull the plug
As a leader, you want to give your employees the ability to grow. Because of this, your natural instinct will be to quickly forgive team members when mistakes are made. You'll always want to continue giving them more chances to succeed--or to hold yourself accountable.
While coaching is essential, there are times when people won't fit in your company cultureand coaching won't help. You'll know when this happens. There are constant arguments and a lack of motivation. Over time you'll realize that the person isn't going to fulfill his or her full potential in your company. Once you start seeing traces of this, it's time to ask that person to leave.
I've shadowed countless startup CEOs and one common thread is that they all regret firing employees too late. Not one has told me about regret for letting someone go too early.
Your job is to decide whether the person you hired is making mistakes that you can fix or if he or she is damaging the culture of your company. If it's the latter, be swift and part ways. Keeping employees who don't fit with your mission will not only hurt your business but also hurt them in the long run as well.
2. Not Giving Performance Reviews
When your employees make mistakes, sometimes there's so much on your plate that you shortcut the time to coach them. This is a big problem, because when all the mistakes start piling up, it becomes too much to fix. Small mistakes from team members early on are OK as long as you are making sure they are aware of the error. When you let them know where they are messing up, it gives them a fair chance to fix their performance.
The other problem with not providing feedback is that when teammates are asked to leave, it takes them by surprise. When asked why they were let go, you list the mistakes that they made. The immediate question they will ask you is why you never brought this up sooner. Maybe if you had brought the issue to them when it occurred, they would have had time to fix it. Think of it as a crack in your windshield: The longer you go without addressing it, the worse it will get. Instead, be up front when you're unhappy with a team member's performance. If that person is unable to improve, you and the employee will both understand exactly why a firing needs to occur.
3. Taking It Personally
Letting someone go in a startup is different from the way it is in the corporate world. When you fire an employee during the early stages of a company, that person usually will have developed more of a personal friendship with you. You helped build the foundation together. The worker made huge sacrifices and took a lot of risk to join your venture and--in most cases--even took a sharp pay cut.
After all the sacrifices the employee has made, he or she will probably take the firing personally. When you're in this situation, you'll have to risk the fact that you're not just losing a team member but also a friend. It's difficult not to dwell on how unfortunate the situation is, but in the end you have to come to grips with your decision.
It's impossible to do something worthwhile and be liked by everyone. Mad competitors, upset customers, and angry previous employees are all a part of being a leader. They aren't the easiest aspects to deal with, but they present the challenges we need to overcome to become better leaders.
From Inc. Magazine

3 Important Signs of Entrepreneurial Burnout and How to Overcome It

Most people experience burnout at least once in their life. Some of us experience it multiple times.

Chances are you are reading this article because you are a business owner or want to be a business owner -- or a creative, or someone looking to take their career to the next level. If so, then you most likely have an appetite for productivity and are hot on the trail of success.
But this means you are also a prime candidate for burnout if you aren’t careful.
The first and often most difficult step to avoiding and overcoming burnout is identifying it.  This can be tricky because it doesn’t always look like you might think. 
Here are some different ways it shows up:

1. Running on empty

The typical burnout exhibits in the form of utter and complete exhaustion -- when you feel as if you are running on empty and no amount of rest seems to be enough, ever. You lose your drive, your joy, your life force.

2. Anxiety and panic attacks

Sometimes when a person has never experienced a panic attack before and he or she has one, it may seem like a life-threatening situation that sends the person straight to the ER. Despite the shortness of breath and pain in the chest, the doctors say it was “just an anxiety attack.”
Burnout can cause a constant state of anxiety and stress where your senses are on overdrive and you are on a “fight or flight” plane of existence.

3. Feeling overwhelmed

Before you were always king or queen of your domain, winning at life and taking names, but now you want to stop the world and get off because everything seems to be just too much to handle and you want to crawl into a hole and not come out.
Because burnout is a common thing for entrepreneurs, if you find yourself experiencing it, be sure to go easy on yourself. Remember you are human, your body has limits and you can only push it so far. You will tell yourself you are lazy and try to keep moving forward but, in true burnout, you will not be able to keep going.

How to overcome business burnout

The most important thing to do when you have hit the burnout wall is to focus on self-care. If you have been working on chasing and building your dreams, you have probably had tunnel vision for quite some time and left your self-care far behind you.
When you have already reached burnout status, these are some things I do to get back to health sooner. You can try them, too.
Massage and reflexology: You really can’t get too many of these when you are in burnout mode. Your nervous system is frazzled and massage can help to calm it. That's why I do this once a week if I can.
Acupuncture: One of the most effective methods I’ve found for ridding anxiety that doesn’t involve medication. Also one of the most restorative naps you will ever take with needles in your skin (scary at first, but I find one of the most relaxing things you can do for yourself if you surrender to it).
Sleep: Focus on getting plenty of sleep, and good sleep hygiene means going to bed and waking at the same time each day. Your mind and body need sleep more than you think.
Play: In other words, get a life. Take a fun fitness class, hang out with your friends, toss a Frisbee at the park, play a game of chess with a friend, spend time wrestling with your kids. Laugh your ass off.
Eat well: Get your eating on a schedule and fuel up regularly with healthy stuff like greens, veggies, fruit and lean protein. You are probably guilty of skipping meals in lieu of working straight through the day and then eating a large supreme pizza by yourself at 11 p.m. finally, then staying up half the night with heartburn only to do it again the next day. You want to minimize caffeine and sugar intake as well, as these things can heighten anxiety.
These are just a few of the fundamental things you can do to overcome burnout, and you will probably find your own methods for restoring your motivation and energy. The way to avoid burnout altogether is to keep these strategies in your regular routine of self-care maintenance so your work is more productive and sustainable. 
Make these tactics daily and weekly priorities and you can set yourself up for the win indefinitely.
From Entrepreneur

Tuesday, 23 September 2014

9 Ways to Say No to Negativity

Use proven techniques for seeing the bright side—for a powerful effect on your psyche. 

When you’re naturally a glass-half-empty kind of person, hearing slogans like “Think positive!” can make you feel like you’re an occasional jogger being told to run a marathon… tomorrow. Before you can implement positivity strategies—and reap their benefits of improved health, better relationships and more happiness—you have to start by decreasing negativity. 

We collected the best negativity reduction tips from psychologists, coaches and authors to help you identify your look-on-the-gray-side habits and begin to chip away at them. There’s a shiny bright side waiting for you! 

1. Set reasonable goals. “A lot of people who see the negative side of things also tend to put themselves down because they set huge, intimidating goals that are difficult to attain,” says Lavinia Lumezanu, a marketing executive and leadership trainer. So instead of saying, “I’m going to write a book this year!” start with a goal of signing up for a writers’ class or completing three pages instead. The satisfaction in reaching these smaller goals will motivate you to reach the next one. 

2. Turn “problems” into “challenges.” Words are very powerful, says Kristi Ling, author of Empower Your Day: Keys to Creating More Happiness, Energy and Success Through Positive Mornings. “Try creating a list of negative words or phrases that you use often and replace them with ones that are a bit more positive.” If you regularly complain of problems, for example, start referring to them as challenges instead. Eliminate the phrase “I should…” from your self-talk, too, and replace it with “I could choose to…,” says licensed mental health counselor Carol Patterson, a therapist in Vancouver, Wash. “Should” carries obligation, dread and resentment. “Choose” puts you in the driver’s seat, as in “I could choose to do this laundry now so that I can relax tonight.” While it may seem like simple semantics, the words you use every day in your self-talk can have a real effect on your attitude. 

3. Reset your default answer. People who are naturally negative tend to use no as their first response to new ideas and experiences, says Lynette Louise, a neurofeedback therapist. “In part, they do this to buy time while actually making a decision, but then they end up defending the ‘no’ choice and sticking to it, even at times when they might not have.” Default instead to “I’m not sure; give me a minute,” she suggests. Then try to find a good reason to say yes before you say no. 

4. Display that award. “It can be important to have physical reminders of positivity in one’s environment,” says Frank Addonizio, Ph.D., vice president of Global Clinical Counseling Services for Workplace Options, an employee work-life services company in Raleigh, N.C. What works: anything that reminds you of past achievements (awards, published writing, a business card), satisfying relationships (photos, artwork by your kids) or positive personal attributes (maybe a gift or letter from an appreciative client or boss that details some of your talents). It’s hard to get down on yourself in the face of real proof of your abilities and full life. 

5. Put your hands up! Historically, humans and other animals have expressed power through large, open postures. Think of a peacock fanning his tail or a negotiator standing and straightening up while her opponent sits. Powerlessness is conveyed through body language, too; think of frightened children curled in the fetal position, or a shy person with slouched shoulders and downcast eyes. Standing up tall and spreading your arms might make you look bigger and more powerful, but can it actually convey power? In 2012 researchers from Harvard asked study participants to hold either one of two “power poses” (one was leaning back in a chair with hands behind head, elbows out and legs raised on a table in front) or a low-power pose (standing with arms hugging chest and ankles crossed) for one minute each. Before-and-after heart rate and blood tests showed that those who held the high-power pose increased their levels of testosterone (a hormone involved with feelings and expressions of confidence and dominance) and lowered their levels of cortisol (a stress hormone). In interviews, they revealed feeling more powerful and open to risk. Low-power posers had the opposite results. 

So the next time you need a confidence boost, strike a pose. Dana Santas, the yoga trainer for the Philadelphia Phillies, the Pittsburgh Pirates and the Tampa Bay Lightning, instructs athletes to hold the “Mountain Pose with Arms Up” when they lose that eye of the tiger. It’s super-simple: Stand with your feet hip-distance apart. Inhale and raise your arms overhead at shoulder width. Close your eyes and take 10 long, deep breaths. On your last exhalation, draw your palms down and together in the middle of your chest and turn the corners of your mouth up in a smile. Take two or three more deep breaths, exhaling through your nose. 

6. Be a critical thinker, not a critical person. “I have a client who struggled with always seeing the negative in everything,” says Elaine Taylor-Klaus, a life coach. “We figured out her brain was just wired as a critical thinker. She approaches everything critically, and that can be a good thing. She just had to work on reminding herself that an opportunity for improvement is not a criticism. Something can be not the way she imagined it and not be wrong.” If you’re a critical, analytical thinker, Taylor-Klaus says, recognize that you are likely to have the critical thought first, but practice redirecting those thoughts by asking yourself, What else is also true about this situation/dilemma/person? 

7. Wake up on the right side of the bed. When you first wake up, it’s easy to start thinking about all the stuff you have to get done that day or complain about how the kids kept you up all night. Instead of letting your head go to those negative places, Shawn Anderson, author of Extra Mile America: Stories of Inspiration, Possibility and Purpose, suggests asking yourself three “morning questions”: 1) What am I excited about doing today? 2) Who can I encourage or serve today? (Get the focus off yourself.) 3) What am I grateful for? Thinking about all that you have and are excited about can change your outlook and attitude for the whole day. 

8. Detox from bad news. We’re not suggesting that you live in a hole or pretend that strife and tragedy don’t exist, but until you can build up some immunity (through these tips and other strategies you’ll find at SUCCESS.com) to the negativity that the evening news can deliver, take a break from it, suggests Colene Elridge, a life coach in Lexington, Ky. If it’s Facebook that’s getting you down (Why does everyone else look so darn happy? Why is everyone posting articles I don’t agree with?), suspend your account. Resist the urge to read the terrible details of the latest crash or kidnapping. 

9. Drop your distortions. There are negative things in the world. Some “sky-is-gray” people are skeptical of focusing on the positive in fear of being “delusional” and not seeing those very real negatives, says Elizabeth Lombardo, Ph.D., author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness. But we all have cognitive thinking distortions that can alter our perceptions of reality, she says, perhaps causing the negatives to appear fun-house-mirror large. A few common distortions include mindreading, when you assume you know what others think (someone asks you to lunch, for example, and you assume it’s because he feels bad for you); fortunetelling, when you predict the future negatively and then react as if that prediction is imminent (you assume an upcoming company meeting means you’re being let go and begin bad-mouthing your boss and ignoring work); or dichotomous thinking, in which everything is all or nothing (Everyone thinks I am a loser or no one can be trusted). Recognize what your distortions are and see whether you can view circumstances through a clearer, more helpful lens. 

From Success Magazine

10 Ways Entrepreneurs Think Differently

10 Ways Entrepreneurs Think Differently
Entrepreneurs are a unique breed of people. While some people sit and fantasize about the glamor of being their own boss and creating their own business, those in the thick of business ownership understand that even considering all its rewards, entrepreneurship is a difficult and complicated path.

The world's most successful entrepreneurs aren’t the ones who impulsively quit their jobs to chase a get-rich-quick idea. They are the ones with an entrepreneurial mindset -- a set of perspectives and values that allow them to achieve greatness.
These 10 perspectives are differentiators you’ll need to have or develop if you’re going to be a successful business owner.
1. Challenges are opportunities. Setbacks, obstacles and challenges are painfully common elements of entrepreneurship. Most people react to these hurdles with stress and pessimism, with an attitude that obstacles are negative experiences that only hinder progress. As an entrepreneur, you encounter so many challenges you simply can’t afford to react this way.
Instead, successful entrepreneurs view challenges as opportunities. Each challenge or setback reveals a key opportunity to grow -- either to improve upon an existing weakness or take measures to avoid experiencing a similar setback in the future.
2. Competitors are research subjects. Rather than viewing competitors as a threat, like most people would, entrepreneurs see competitors as enriching opportunities to learn more about their industry and target market. By looking at your competitors’ business models, you can learn what makes yours unique and embellish that uniqueness in your branding and marketing efforts. Studying your competitors’ emphasis on customer experience can teach you how to make yours better.
Your competitors are doing you a favor -- they’ve already gathered tons of valuable information. Entrepreneurs realize that it’s up to them to take advantage of it.
3. Everything requires effort. Entrepreneurship is multifaceted and constantly demanding, and there’s no shortage of pitfalls that could disrupt or destroy your business. Successful entrepreneurs are aware of this, and they’re aware that everything -- from product development, sales and marketing -- requires significant effort to achieve success. Instead of looking for shortcuts, they’re pouring effort into their business at every opportunity, and when they reach one goal, they’re already busy planning another.
4. Perfection is the enemy of progress. It’s a familiar aphorism that nobody understands better than entrepreneurs. Young or inexperienced entrepreneurs might get caught up in chasing their original vision, because original visions are almost invariably “perfect.” But perfection isn’t necessary to run a successful, profitable business. 
In fact, perfection is often what stalls progress. The time you spend trying to hammer down those last few details is likely going to end up as time wasted. Instead, spend your efforts on the big picture, and make sure it’s solid.
5. Big things are made from small components. This works for problems as well as solutions. For example, instead of seeing a content-marketing campaign as a quick way to get traffic and new business, entrepreneurs see content marketing in terms of its individual components (blogging, social-media marketing, link building, etc.), each of which has its own advantages and disadvantages. Successful entrepreneurs can break down massive projects, problems and campaigns into smaller, more manageable pieces.
6. Mistakes are healthy. The popular vision of massively successful entrepreneurs such as Steve Jobs or Jeff Bezos illustrates them as infallible leaders. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Successful entrepreneurs, even the rock stars among them, make mistakes often. Furthermore, they aren’t afraid to make mistakes, and they know how to learn from them.
Making mistakes is healthy and normal, and the sooner entrepreneurs realize that, the better. Don’t waste time doing everything you can to avoid mistakes or beat yourself up after making one. Acknowledge your mistakes, figure out what you can do to make up for them, and move on.
7. There is no magic. The super-rich entrepreneurs you read about in the news usually didn’t get there because they randomly stumbled upon a great idea. They got there because they poured years of effort and passion into a good idea, and eventually their efforts paid off.
You can’t become an entrepreneur expecting there to be a miracle, or some kind of instant, magical rise to the top because your idea was revolutionary. Even the best ideas in the world require patience, skill and endless effort to earn that level of success. The world's best entrepreneurs realize this. Waiting for your idea to do the work on its own, or waiting for some unseen element to carry you to success can only result in disaster.
8. Outside perspective is invaluable. Entrepreneurs need to be good communicators, and that means actively listening to those with different ideas and opinions. It’s easy for us to get trapped in one mode of thinking.
Many business owners keep their business models and directives too rigid, ultimately restricting their ability to grow and leading to failure. Successful entrepreneurs, on the other hand, are constantly searching for individuals and experiences that will challenge their way of thinking and lead them to see things from a new perspective.
9. Discipline is a prerequisite. To most people, discipline is something extra. It takes extra thought and effort to exercise, wake up on time or do anything other than spend leisure time. To successful entrepreneurs, discipline is normal. It’s a prerequisite that carries into all aspects of their lives.
You don’t have to be a regimented military-style leader to be disciplined, but you do have to know what you want and be prepared to do whatever it takes to get it.
10. Entrepreneurship is a lifestyle. Entrepreneurs wake up as entrepreneurs, go to work as entrepreneurs, come home as entrepreneurs and go to bed as entrepreneurs. There is no nine to five. There is no “work life” and “home life.”
The advantage of this is that you have total control over your business and your professional choices, including what you do for it. The (possible) disadvantage of this is that you carry your business with you everywhere you go. Entrepreneurship becomes your work and your life, and you need to be prepared for that if you’re going to survive the lifestyle.
Being a successful entrepreneur isn’t about being born with a specific mindset, it’s about being prepared for the challenges that await you.
From Entrepreneur

Monday, 22 September 2014

“I’ve Fallen And I Can’t Get Up…”

“I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”

You probably recognize this popular catch phrase from the television commercial for Life Alert… or perhaps from the comedic punchlines that have become a part of pop culture as a result.

In fact, it’s probably one of the most recognized slogans of all time.

The original commercial for Life Alert, a personal medical-alert system, showed an elderly woman who had fallen. The woman pushes a button on the Life Alert pendant she’s wearing around her neck. Instantly connected to a 24-hour medical response team, she says, “Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.”

Bad acting made the commercial the butt of many jokes, however the company probably got the last laugh as it has obviously been an effective way to sell their product for more than 24 years. They continue to run versions of that same commercial and even made the popular catch phrase a registered trademark.

Now the company is running a new version of the commercial that is very realistic.

In fact, it’s so realistic some say it is scarier than stuff they watch on TV.

The new ad shows an empty house while playing eerie music. It pans different objects and scenes inside the empty house. In the background you can hear a woman whimpering. Just outside her window, a couple plays with a dog. And then it pans to a woman lying at the bottom of the basement stairs, crying for help.  The commercial then shows a screen that says, “When You Fall and Cannot Get Up, an ACCIDENT can turn into a TRADEGY!”

So the question is –how does the same catch phrase used by the same company for more than two decades continue to be so effective at selling their product?

And how is it that it worked when in a really bad commercial as well as in the new very realistic, very well scripted and produced one?

This seems contradictory.

Especially when you think about how bad the original commercial was.

As I alluded to above, the original commercial has been ridiculed, insulted, and referenced many times over by comedians.

The new one on the complete opposite end of the spectrum has been called disturbing and too believable.

The reason this phrase works so well—whether the ad is well scripted, acted and produced or not, is that the premise—“I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” is a real fear.

Elderly people fear losing their independence.

Family members of elderly parents fear something will happen to their loved one, with no phone nearby, and no one to hear their cries for help.

In other words, it taps into a fear that already exists.

There is no need to convince someone that this is a possibility. No need to go into a lengthy or even a real story about it happening to someone. People already know this possibility exists.

I’m going to say that again, because this is a HUGE key to a successful ad.

Tap into an emotion—a storyline that is already running inside your prospect’s head.

Although fear is certainly a popular emotion you’ve seen in ads such as the anti-smoking commercials or political campaigns, there are many other emotions and storylines that you can tap into as well.

For example, online dating services tap into the “happily ever after” story that already exists in people’s heads.

Car commercials often tap into the idea of having something that everyone else wants, but is uniquely yours.

There is always an emotional storyline that is playing in your prospect’s head. The key is to figure out what that emotional storyline is (hint: there might be more than one) and then engage your prospect with words that tap into it. When you do, that’s when you’ll make the sale.

Written by Dan Kennedy

Sunday, 21 September 2014

18 Things Highly Creative People Do Differently

CREATIVITY


Creativity works in mysterious and often paradoxical ways. Creative thinking is a stable, defining characteristic in some personalities, but it may also change based on situation and context. Inspiration and ideas often arise seemingly out of nowhere and then fail to show up when we most need them, and creative thinking requires complex cognition yet is completely distinct from the thinking process.

Neuroscience paints a complicated picture of creativity. As scientists now understand it, creativity is far more complex than the right-left brain distinction would have us think (the theory being that left brain = rational and analytical, right brain = creative and emotional). In fact, creativity is thought to involve a number of cognitive processes, neural pathways and emotions, and we still don't have the full picture of how the imaginative mind works.
And psychologically speaking, creative personality types are difficult to pin down, largely because they're complex, paradoxical and tend to avoid habit or routine. And it's not just a stereotype of the "tortured artist" -- artists really may be more complicated people. Research has suggested that creativity involves the coming together of a multitude of traits, behaviors and social influences in a single person.
"It's actually hard for creative people to know themselves because the creative self is more complex than the non-creative self," Scott Barry Kaufman, a psychologist at New York University who has spent years researching creativity, told The Huffington Post. "The things that stand out the most are the paradoxes of the creative self ... Imaginative people have messier minds."
While there's no "typical" creative type, there are some tell-tale characteristics and behaviors of highly creative people. Here are 18 things they do differently.
They daydream.
daydreaming child
Creative types know, despite what their third-grade teachers may have said, that daydreaming is anything but a waste of time.
According to Kaufman and psychologist Rebecca L. McMillan, who co-authored a paper titled "Ode To Positive Constructive Daydreaming," mind-wandering can aid in the process of "creative incubation." And of course, many of us know from experience that our best ideas come seemingly out of the blue when our minds are elsewhere.
Although daydreaming may seem mindless, a 2012 study suggested it could actually involve a highly engaged brain state -- daydreaming can lead to sudden connections and insights because it's related to our ability to recall information in the face of distractions. Neuroscientists have also found that daydreaming involves the same brain processes associated with imagination and creativity.
They observe everything.
The world is a creative person's oyster -- they see possibilities everywhere and are constantly taking in information that becomes fodder for creative expression. As Henry James is widely quoted, a writer is someone on whom "nothing is lost."
The writer Joan Didion kept a notebook with her at all times, and said that she wrote down observations about people and events as, ultimately, a way to better understand the complexities and contradictions of her own mind:
"However dutifully we record what we see around us, the common denominator of all we see is always, transparently, shamelessly, the implacable 'I,'" Didion wrote in her essay On Keeping A Notebook. "We are talking about something private, about bits of the mind’s string too short to use, an indiscriminate and erratic assemblage with meaning only for its marker."
They work the hours that work for them.
Many great artists have said that they do their best work either very early in the morning or late at night. Vladimir Nabokov started writing immediately after he woke up at 6 or 7 a.m., and Frank Lloyd Wright made a practice of waking up at 3 or 4 a.m. and working for several hours before heading back to bed. No matter when it is, individuals with high creative output will often figure out what time it is that their minds start firing up, and structure their days accordingly.
They take time for solitude.
solitude
"In order to be open to creativity, one must have the capacity for constructive use of solitude. One must overcome the fear of being alone," wrote the American existential psychologist Rollo May.
Artists and creatives are often stereotyped as being loners, and while this may not actually be the case, solitude can be the key to producing their best work. For Kaufman, this links back to daydreaming -- we need to give ourselves the time alone to simply allow our minds to wander.
"You need to get in touch with that inner monologue to be able to express it," he says. "It's hard to find that inner creative voice if you're ... not getting in touch with yourself and reflecting on yourself."
They turn life's obstacles around.
Many of the most iconic stories and songs of all time have been inspired by gut-wrenching pain and heartbreak -- and the silver lining of these challenges is that they may have been the catalyst to create great art. An emerging field of psychology called post-traumatic growth is suggesting that many people are able to use their hardships and early-life trauma for substantial creative growth. Specifically, researchers have found that trauma can help people to grow in the areas of interpersonal relationships, spirituality, appreciation of life, personal strength, and -- most importantly for creativity -- seeing new possibilities in life.
"A lot of people are able to use that as the fuel they need to come up with a different perspective on reality," says Kaufman. "What's happened is that their view of the world as a safe place, or as a certain type of place, has been shattered at some point in their life, causing them to go on the periphery and see things in a new, fresh light, and that's very conducive to creativity."
They seek out new experiences.
solo traveler
Creative people love to expose themselves to new experiences, sensations and states of mind -- and this openness is a significant predictor of creative output.
"Openness to experience is consistently the strongest predictor of creative achievement," says Kaufman. "This consists of lots of different facets, but they're all related to each other: Intellectual curiosity, thrill seeking, openness to your emotions, openness to fantasy. The thing that brings them all together is a drive for cognitive and behavioral exploration of the world, your inner world and your outer world."
They "fail up."
resilience
Resilience is practically a prerequisite for creative success, says Kaufman. Doing creative work is often described as a process of failing repeatedly until you find something that sticks, and creatives -- at least the successful ones -- learn not to take failure so personally.
"Creatives fail and the really good ones fail often," Forbes contributor Steven Kotler wrote in a piece on Einstein's creative genius.
They ask the big questions.
Creative people are insatiably curious -- they generally opt to live the examined life, and even as they get older, maintain a sense of curiosity about life. Whether through intense conversation or solitary mind-wandering, creatives look at the world around them and want to know why, and how, it is the way it is.
They people-watch.
people watching
Observant by nature and curious about the lives of others, creative types often love to people-watch -- and they may generate some of their best ideas from it.
"[Marcel] Proust spent almost his whole life people-watching, and he wrote down his observations, and it eventually came out in his books," says Kaufman. "For a lot of writers, people-watching is very important ... They're keen observers of human nature."
They take risks.
Part of doing creative work is taking risks, and many creative types thrive off of taking risks in various aspects of their lives.
"There is a deep and meaningful connection between risk taking and creativity and it's one that's often overlooked," contributor Steven Kotler wrote in Forbes. "Creativity is the act of making something from nothing. It requires making public those bets first placed by imagination. This is not a job for the timid. Time wasted, reputation tarnished, money not well spent -- these are all by-products of creativity gone awry."
They view all of life as an opportunity for self-expression.
self expression
Nietzsche believed that one's life and the world should be viewed as a work of art. Creative types may be more likely to see the world this way, and to constantly seek opportunities for self-expression in everyday life.
"Creative expression is self-expression," says Kaufman. "Creativity is nothing more than an individual expression of your needs, desires and uniqueness."
They follow their true passions.
Creative people tend to be intrinsically motivated -- meaning that they're motivated to act from some internal desire, rather than a desire for external reward or recognition. Psychologists have shown that creative people are energized by challenging activities, a sign of intrinsic motivation, and the research suggests that simply thinking of intrinsic reasons to perform an activity may be enough to boost creativity.
"Eminent creators choose and become passionately involved in challenging, risky problems that provide a powerful sense of power from the ability to use their talents,"write M.A. Collins and T.M. Amabile in The Handbook of Creativity.
They get out of their own heads.
creative writing
Kaufman argues that another purpose of daydreaming is to help us to get out of our own limited perspective and explore other ways of thinking, which can be an important asset to creative work.
"Daydreaming has evolved to allow us to let go of the present," says Kaufman. "The same brain network associated with daydreaming is the brain network associated with theory of mind -- I like calling it the 'imagination brain network' -- it allows you to imagine your future self, but it also allows you to imagine what someone else is thinking."
Research has also suggested that inducing "psychological distance" -- that is, taking another person's perspective or thinking about a question as if it was unreal or unfamiliar -- can boost creative thinking.
They lose track of the time.
Creative types may find that when they're writing, dancing, painting or expressing themselves in another way, they get "in the zone," or what's known as a flow state, which can help them to create at their highest level. Flow is a mental state when an individual transcends conscious thought to reach a heightened state of effortless concentration and calmness. When someone is in this state, they're practically immune to any internal or external pressures and distractions that could hinder their performance.
You get into the flow state when you're performing an activity you enjoy that you're good at, but that also challenges you -- as any good creative project does.
"[Creative people] have found the thing they love, but they've also built up the skill in it to be able to get into the flow state," says Kaufman. "The flow state requires a match between your skill set and the task or activity you're engaging in."
They surround themselves with beauty.
Creatives tend to have excellent taste, and as a result, they enjoy being surrounded by beauty.
A study recently published in the journal Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts showed that musicians -- including orchestra musicians, music teachers, and soloists -- exhibit a high sensitivity and responsiveness to artistic beauty.
They connect the dots.
doodle
If there's one thing that distinguishes highly creative people from others, it's the ability to see possibilities where others don't -- or, in other words, vision. Many great artists and writers have said that creativity is simply the ability to connect the dots that others might never think to connect.
In the words of Steve Jobs:
"Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn't really do it, they just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while. That's because they were able to connect experiences they've had and synthesize new things."
They constantly shake things up.
Diversity of experience, more than anything else, is critical to creativity, says Kaufman. Creatives like to shake things up, experience new things, and avoid anything that makes life more monotonous or mundane.
"Creative people have more diversity of experiences, and habit is the killer of diversity of experience," says Kaufman.
They make time for mindfulness.
Creative types understand the value of a clear and focused mind -- because their work depends on it. Many artists, entrepreneurs, writers and other creative workers, such as David Lynch, have turned to meditation as a tool for tapping into their most creative state of mind.
And science backs up the idea that mindfulness really can boost your brain power in a number of ways. A 2012 Dutch study suggested that certain meditation techniques can promote creative thinking. And mindfulness practices have been linked with improved memory and focus, better emotional well-being, reduced stress and anxiety, and improved mental clarity -- all of which can lead to better creative thought.
From Huffington Post